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Showing posts from June, 2018

Dirty Stinkin' Commies! (And Other Improprieties)

    So it has come down to it at last. The final nail in the coffin. The ending waltz on the dance floor. The last Pringle in the can. Or something. Either way, we have sworn in another president, we have upheld our particularly American brand of Democracy, and we are all certainly awaiting every politician to be taken into custody, executed, and then for Trump to rule forever. Q just has to be correct right? The track record is.... stunning? Pictured: Q at his computer, or something. Creator: Rembrandt  |  Credit: Hermitage     Either way, our country has reached the dawning of a new administration. An event that has happened 45 previous times, and will undoubtedly happen many many more. But along the way, there was a bit of... discourse, if you could call it that. Most of it was spurned on by the greatest of all threats in this day and age, the Keyboard Warriors. Yes, this multi-class, 12th level, 5h Edition DnD champion has, for the last 5-6 years at least, had an alarmingly large a

Often Lonely, Never Alone

An often repeated saying is "You are not alone." Its been repeated ad nauseam for years by a vast number of people. So much so, that it tends to lose some meaning towards the people that need it the most. So why is it such a redundant statement that we feel we need to reiterate so many times? There are over 6 Billion people on earth, of course we aren't alone. I go to work, have friends, have family. Of course I'm not alone. We are probably 10 years or so from being visited by aliens which might-not-go so-good-but-hey-whatever-yolo (ed note: Hail Xenu.) so yeah, not alone.... So why do we FEEL so alone at times? Its often true that we struggle with loneliness. Whether it be from actually being alone, or from feeling like we have no one to relate or interact with, loneliness is endemic to society. We are a social animal, we dislike being without anyone by our side for very long, and so, seek comfort in groups, in relationships, in people. But is it always like th

For Sale. New World. Never Used.

There is a great issue bubbling up in this land. No not that one. No, the other one. No NO! Not THAT one... Okay there are a great MANY issues bubbling up in this land, but none so heinous as what is now happening at our nations border. Let me get one thing straight right off the bat. I love satire, cynicism and black comedy. I will make fun and play around with almost anything. This is not to say I do not see the seriousness of said issues, or that I take them lightly. Its simply so that I can retain my sanity in this crazy world of ours. So, with that said, lets begin. Taking kids is bad. A necessary bad in some cases such as child abuse, broken homes, drug/crime related problems, etc. However, at its underlying core, removing children from their parents grasp is generally seen as not a healthy thing to do. This is the base issue. The lowest and most basic problem with this current action taken up by our countries government. The broader issue is one of immigration. One that has, a

Life, Death, and why Existence Hates You

Anyone who knows me well knows of a quote that I always refer back to: "Quotation marks make things sound more important than they really are. Especially fake things."  -Abraham Lincoln (impersonator) 2009 These words, which I have definitely said many times in my life (ed note: wink wink) have given me many things to think on. Many things that have become more and more relevant as our world spins round in this year of 2018. For instance, the above quote, (which is, like, totes real guys), is so blatantly fake that even the Nigerian Princes are shaking their heads in disbelief. But these days, one can't be so sure about what you read. Or hear. Or watch. OR EXPERIENCE!! You see, in an era where buzzwords like "fake news" and "alternative facts" and "oh god what the hell now" are becoming more and more commonplace, we have started to develop an innate bullshit sensor that helps us to cut through the crap and figure out what's rea